As mentioned in my previous Living With Body Dysmorphia: My Story post, one of my resolutions this year was to post more fashion related content. So here it is, my first ever fashion post. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a tad nervous. Silly, I know. The photo quality is awful and the mirror isn't the most clear, but this is new to me and I don't want to invest in anything better until I know for sure that I want to continue with this segment. Before I ramble on, let's get into this..

Little fact about me.. I love fashion and TV shows. A whole bunch. So much so that I am known to take inspiration from fictional characters when it comes to my daily outfits. If it weren't for a few weeks ago, I wouldn't of thought this to be a problem. But I there I was, standing in front of my wardrobe deciding on an outfit, and I realised that I was basing what I wanted to wear by which character's mentality I wanted for the day. Yeah.. This could be the defining moment that one would realise they have lost their marbles, but I'm a cup half full kind of girl so instead I saw an opportunity for blog posts. Yippee. You gain from my inability to be sane! This segment will be called.. *insert drum roll here* .. Inspired OOTD's! Don't be disheartened by my originality, I was born with it. (That was sarcasm, btw.) In all seriousness, I'm really looking forward to trying my hand at these posts and I hope you enjoy skimming them. Please be kind.

My first outfit post is inspired by the most underrated character to ever be on a sitcom: The Mother in How I Met Your Mother, also known as Tracy Mosby (née McConnell) played by Cristin Milioti. Rather ironic, isn't it? The entire show was dedicated to her and Ted's story, yet we barely got a handful of episodes with her awesomeness. A shame. Anywho, I fell in love with this outfit (pictured below) that she wore over the course of a few episodes and immediately began to look for a similar dress. You might recognize the dress from the 50 Shades Of Grey movie, as Dakota Johnson's character Anastasia Steele wore the same one at some point. Only she paired it with a grey blazer, tights and some brogues, A nice version that I might also recreate at some point. Not that I would want her character's mentality. Oy vey.

I've wanted to write this post since I made this blog over a year ago. I wanted to use whatever platform I have for good. I wanted to help at least one person who might be going through something vaguely similar to me. I wanted.. I wanted a lot. Turns out, it isn't always that easy. I found myself constantly putting this post off by finding something else to write about, procrastinating until I "didn't have the time", but no more. This was a resolution, and I stick to those things. This will be a long one, and I apologize if you aren't the least bit interested in reading about me and my life. I'm not sure whether there is even a point to this post just yet, but I know I need to write it and that ought to be enough. Perhaps we'll figure it out together. Grab a tea (Or coffee. Go with coffee.), and I hope you make sense of my rambles.

According to the NHS website, Body Dysmorphic Disorder (also known as BDD) affects 1 in every 100 people in the UK alone. It's an anxiety based condition, and my own likely stemmed from social anxiety and a low period in my teenage years. Now, I'm not a doctor nor am I trained in the medical field. I can just about put a plaster on a cut. So how much insight I can offer into the condition itself is based solely on my own experience. I have yet to seek medical help, although I did have a batch of therapy late last Autumn that was initially meant for discussing my health but happened to stumble onto this topic a whole bunch. Turns out, I kind of suck at discussing things that affect me to strangers. Or friends. Or the boyfriend. My issue is, I feel like I will annoy them by burdening them with such information, which is beyond idiotic as I'd likely be offended if they felt they couldn't come to me with their own worries or problems. Anne's brain, ladies and folks.

For this to make an ounce of sense, we'll have to start at the beginning. I had just turned 12 when I started to dislike my appearance. I would look in the mirror and hate the girl staring back at me, I often still do that. You can't say I'm not a young lady of habit, heh. Yes, I mask my awkwardness with humour. I was chubbier than most girls my age back then, due to various reasons that really don't matter in this blog post. One could argue that it was just that stage of chubbiness that most girls go through,, hormones and physical changes playing a big part in it. I was a young developer. I had lumps of fat on my chest before anyone I knew, and my hips swelled outward. It was just a part of growing up, but I couldn't see past my own reflection to realise that. Or listen to what my mother was yammering on in my ear.

The following year was what I'd call my turning point. For the better? Probably not. But it was the year that moulded me into the person I am today. Home life changed a whole lot and because of that I gained a hefty amount of free time, which I chose to use by becoming obsessed with that reflection I keep referring to. I became aware of what a calorie was, and discovered the likes of Wii Fit and stomach crunches. I lost just under 2 stone in a matter of months. It was unhealthy and I don't want to properly delve into what I put my body through as I don't want to give impressionable readers any ridiculous ideas (you never know with the Internet.), but it was an obsession. I've already used that term to describe the situation and I usually hate repeating myself, but there isn't another word that does it justice. My work outs went from 30 minutes to over 7 hours. I would find myself pulling an all nighter to continue working out when the other people in the household were asleep. I pushed myself above and beyond, all while restricting myself to a mere third of one's usual calorie intake when on a diet. It was.. messy. I was a mess. I don't want to label myself as having an eating disorder, as I find it too big of a word to put on what I went through. So many other girls in the world have it far, far, far worse and my story isn't as important as theirs. So I don't feel like I have a right to include myself on that list, if that makes any sense. Therefore, I will just say that I was a troubled teen. I thought that being thin would result in being happy. Alas, it did not.

Because of all this, I grew up to find it ridiculously hard to eat in front of people. I found it difficult to talk about food with people I didn't know extremely well. I still do, and I still find it difficult to stop working out after 15 minutes, despite the fact that I know it will cause me a great deal of pain. Oh, yes. Fibromyalgia. I ought to probably explain that little dent in my story. It is what doctors describe as a 'chronic pain condition' that affects people in a various ways. I, myself, get widespread pain and skin sensitivity after prolonged activity or stress, followed by fatigue, migraines, and patches of insomnia. I was officially diagnosed shortly after I turned seventeen, but the signs had been there from when I was 13 years old. Yeah, the strain that I put on my body could of brought forth the condition sooner than it would have if I had not, but that is something we can never know for certain. It's just a thing. It's there and I'm still in the process of easing it. But anywho, this is besides the point.. Exercise was my escape, and I lost that the second pain became it's following act. This is undoubtedly the main reason why I have such an unhealthy relationship with food. It's my only source of control. I can't choose when to work up a sweat any more, nor can I choose where my life is leading.. But food? I can choose what goes in my mouth and I get the choice of how much gets eaten. It's terrible to write such a thing, but I can't hide from the abundant truth. I lack a sense of leadership in my own life, so my mind naturally takes advantage of it when I find some.

This is the part of the story where facts get blurred and the timeline gets muddled. All I know is, I never felt like I lost a pound in spite of those years. I'm 19 years old as I write this, and I still don't. I wake up everyday and feel embarrassed when I look into that shiny thing we call a mirror. That may be too honest, but that's the point of writing this. Honesty. I often feel sickened when I'm getting dressed and I can feel the skin of my body being tugged and squishing together, when I walk and can feel the way my thighs and stomach wobble and I'm adamant others can see it through the layers that I'm wearing. It hit me the hardest around a week ago, when I was shopping for clothes and tried on three items that were all a size 8 (that's an American size 4 and a European size 36, just FYI), and they were all loose on me, to the point of being unwearable. Loose. A size 8. I didn't and still don't understand. When I looked into that changing room mirror, my body looked at least three sizes larger than that. Not that there is anything wrong with that size, or any size for that matter, so please don't take my words the wrong way. It's just a difficult one to explain. It's hard to voice your thoughts when you never have done before. When I was that 12 year old girl, I envisioned myself being a certain size and being happy because of it, that I would feel confident in my skin if I were what society classes as "small". But I'm not. I can't see it and keep making excuses as to why a shop would make those size 8's in my size. Bad manufacturing, perhaps. And the second store's clothing was meant to be real baggy, that's why it was a little big on me. My brain constantly does this and perhaps because of these pathetic excuses, I can't see what ought to be right in front of me.

I'm now truly scared that I will never feel comfortable in my own skin.

Christ almighty, that was a tough sentence to write. I would normally distract from it with a photo of a cat, but that wouldn't be very professional given the nature of this post.

It may seem silly to some of you that a lack of confidence could be such a burden on someone's daily life. It may even seem conceded. I might agree if this was just about me, but it isn't. There are so many people outside of my story who suffer a great deal with BDD, and I would hate for them to feel big-headed for simply being unhappy. BDD is real and I'm slightly proud of myself for finally seeing that - there was a time that I never thought it to be possible.

Like many conditions, there are good and bad days. Some days I feel brave enough to take a selfie, and only feel like crap for a few hours afterwards. I may even be strong enough to snap a shot of whatever I'm eating and send it to a friend. On the bad days, I don't want to get out of bed. The thought of leaving the house for work or shopping is horrendous, and all I want to do is curl in a ball and cry. Some days I can barely look in the mirror, while the next I want to stare into it every 5 minutes and point out everything that is wrong with me. I can wear a dress and feel okay in it, only to try it on a few days later and weep at the disgusting sight. Same goes for photos. That selfie I took on a good day could be hideous to me hours later, because the many flaws of my face have somehow become louder to my mind. It's waves. Waves of emotions and thoughts. You can't know how you're going to be tomorrow, let alone in a week's time. And as easy as it seems to trust a loved one's opinion on the matter, your brain argues that you can't. Your opinion is the only one that matters to you, because you're the object of argument.

My goal this year was to post more outfit related posts on this blog as fashion is a passion of mine. I adore a good tea dress and have more heels than I could possibly (or hope to) wear. I find nothing more satisfying than a good blazer, and have a major weak spot when it comes to collars. Yet I've been too chicken to post anything resembling a OOTD on here because my body wasn't "ready" yet. 5 weeks ago I posted the first photo below on my Instagram (RootingBranches, btw), and guess what? The world didn't end. Despite the fact various people could see my arms, and I was dressed as an elf (which was arguably the best part of the photo). I'm not going to lie, I've debated deleting the post every single day that it's been up - even this morning. But I didn't and haven't. Powering through, people. So to test the waters further, I uploaded another outfit photo on the 14th of this month. 4 days ago. Which is also pictured below. And guess what? The world, once again, didn't end.
The point of doing this is not to gain attention, good or bad. Or to make people pity me and do the obligatory "you look good!" comments. It's to show how average I am. I look at both of those pictures and I hate them. I see a blob that's trying to look humanly. I see chubby spots and cheeks that are three sizes too big. I see the arms that prevent me from wearing anything sleeveless in public (I hid in a cardigan for the entirety of my career as an elf), and the thighs that make me pair tights with shorts in Summer. I see a wonky boob (yeah, that's a thing. Being a girl is fun.), and wide hips. I digress, there is a point to all of this. Right now, I pledge to try and learn that this is only my interpretation of the images. You may look at them and see something completely different, for better or worse. And that is okay. It's wonderfully human.

My story is what it is. It's messy, but tidier than most people's. Some days I manage, and others I find myself struggling through. But it's me. It's my tale to tell, and you have your own. If you relate to me in the slightest, then I'm ever so sorry that you have to go through the difficulty that is BDD. It's painful and affects your daily life in a way most won't or rather, can't, understand. It's easier to say than do, but you have to learn to accept that a rare few will belittle you for feeling the way you do as they deem it ridiculous or stupid, and there will be some people who look at you strangely in the street for whatever reason. Loved ones who don't know of the battle going on it your mind might make passing thoughtless comments that hurt your feelings. They won't remember what they said in an hours time, but you will cry at night repeating it over and over in your head. It's raw and aches in that way sadness does, but you can get through it. As - this the part you need to jot down - there will also be people in this world who find you beautiful. Who desire your body, or long to have your legs (or waist, or neck, or whatever.). You may scoff just reading this, and I can't ridicule you for that as it would be ridiculous to do so when I, myself, don't believe any compliment that's thrown my way. But you have to try. Just as I am trying by writing this post. How else are we going to get through it all?

I could write more. I could of probably written less. There are still gaps in my story, but they are for another time. For now, I think I'm going to leave it here. At the end of this post I'm going to list some options for you if you want to reach out for help. But I'm not going to preach about it, as it would be awfully hypocritical of me. Just talk to someone. Professional or not. My email is rootingbranches@outlook.com and you are more than welcome to shoot a message my way. My other links are on the sidebar. Just think about it.

 If you know of someone going through this, just do one thing for me.. don't brush their feeling aside as you think it's untrue and can see their beauty. To them, tit's frighteningly real. There is no worse feeling than when you pour your heart out to someone as you feel horrendous, and they reply with a simple "But you're beautiful." or "To me you're beautiful.". They won't believe you, and will be reluctant to come back to you at the risk of you thinking they're being dumb. Listen to them. Ask questions. Don't walk on egg shells. You were given a voice, use it.

So it's that time of year again, when us bloggers write down how our year has gone - our accomplishments and downfalls, and send our hopes for the following year into the universe. This is my first year participating in this, but I look forward to it. Okay, that's a tiny fib. I'm actually a little nervous, which is silly, I know. This is without question a personal post, but I want to start documenting my life better. It would be easy to just write about the good but we learn from the bad, and more often than not, I find the struggles in life shape us into who we are destined to be. Grand scheme and all that. So deep, I know. I digress, once again. I really need to get the hang of not rambling. So, without further adieu.. let's go.

I'm going to be blunt, this year has resembled that roller coaster ride in the third Final Destination movie for me. I wish I was exaggerating, but no. It's been a tough year, plain and simple. But it has also been a year of positive changes, which I want to leave 2015 remembering. But you are going to have to wait to hear about them, and read through the crappy parts first. You're welcome.


Losing a Loved One.
I know that you know that I know we are indeed talking about what some would call just a "pet" here. But at least 80% of you will understand what it means to lose someone who has always been there, pet or otherwise. I don't want to delve into this at this moment in time, so I'll just direct you to the blog post You Are My Sunshine which explains everything. But yes, most definitely the worst part of 2015 was losing a best friend. In a much different circumstance but similar theme, the one I treasure most lost someone he loved this year. And having to go through the motions of that while living countless miles away, was, well.. torture. His sadness was heartbreaking, knowing he was going through such pain.. there are no words. An uncle of mine also lost his second half earlier this year, and knowing the agony he was going through was.. bizarre. That may seem like an odd word to use to describe something so sad, but it's the only one I can think of. Usually we don't know when someone is in pain, people hide it behind closed doors, so to feel it in a room; watch the events unfold.. Indescribable. And yes, bizarre. I had been fortunate prior to 2015 in the sense that I had yet to lose anyone I have loved through death. Nor had I experienced the ordeal through someone else's eyes. In a way, I wish I could say that I understood what grief was before this year, to not appear sheltered and to say that I knew what to say to these people during the tough times, but to be perfectly honest, I still don't understand it. And I have learnt that that is to be expected. Nobody gets it, we just get forced to survive through it. No matter how hard. That may not make sense to anyone other than my own muddled brain. That's okay.

Love
Oy vey. Love was arguably the theme of my 2015. Both with family, friendships, and relationships. And yes, in both the good and bad sense. The first big change was letting go of my first love. We'd be apart relationship wise for a good few months, but earlier this year was when The End would of rolled onto screen and those large plush red curtains would of closed. Almost 5 years. The friendship was and is what I miss the most. I hope that will one day fade, but I doubt it. It was and is a difficult thing to gloss over. The hard thing is, I do believe we could of stayed as friends. No matter how many people bark that it's impossible. We, in a sense, grew up together. But no.. The end credits roll, even when you don't want them to. There will always be some things they didn't wrap up.


Health
Fibromyalgia is a bitch. Plain and simple. I went into this year midway through physical therapy classes, Since then I have completed over 5 months of appointments, a batch of hydrotherapy, and yet my health is still deteriorating. It's perfectly fine. This is probably the better of my low list, but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a tad scary at times. I push myself and I can manage, but it's exhausting. Going through daily chores shouldn't be this exhausting to the body. Though, the hardest part to manage is often in the mind department. It can be mentally dehydrating. (Is that a correct term? Eh. Going with it.) I worry about how this will affect my future, and I worry that it'll keep going worse. But only time will tell. Anyhoo, yes. Not the greatest aspect of 2015.



And time for the lowest of moments....Glee ended. Okay, I'm kidding. Kind of. It was rather traumatic. Thankfully Scream Queens gave me my Lea Michele fix. Don't worry, I made it through. Is the mood lightened a bit yet? No? Okay, here's Bruno in a tie for your viewing pleasure..


Now you're smiling, aren't you? Great! Let's end on the highlights. The clock is ticking.

Blogging
How can I not start with the very thing you are reading this off of? A 2015 resolution of mine was to start a blog. I'm not going to lie, I have created many in the past but always wound up chickening out and deleting the entire thing. But I learnt a world class secret, want to know what it is? Write for you, not for the people who may or may not bother reading your posts. So simple, and yet it took me years to figure out.  I'm a stress head and fret about the little things. Such as, I wasn't going to publish this post until I had taken a decent new "head shot" for my sidebar, as I've grown to detest the photo. So insignificant, and yet it was going to stop me from doing something that I wanted. Silly. I may not post often, nor do my posts have a great quality to them.. But I enjoy it. And that is all that matters. Thank you to anyone who has read anything I've written on here. My little corner of the internet always appreciates a visitor. Really, thank you. (That seems sarcastic, but it really isn't. Nor is this. Maybe my brain just reads everything sarcastically. Hm.)

Germany
My first vacation. My first time going abroad, or well, anywhere, alone. My first plane ride. The first time leaving my cat to fend for himself (He had my mother, I'm not a psychopath.). Oh, the first time leaving my mother to fend for herself. But most importantly.. the first time I did something entirely for myself. It was incredible and I wish I was vlogger so I could have something other than photos to look back on. But alas, I am not and never will be. You can read more about my trip here and here.


Friendship
Paired with that great ol' Germany paragraph up top - friendship. One woman in particular, who was not only the greatest hostess a girl could wish for, but simply a beautiful human. Esma is undoubtedly the strongest female I know, hell, strongest human. And every year she surprises me by continuing to be a wonderful friend, and offering her support when it's needed. You always need a best friend, and I can only hope that she will continue to be the Serena to my Blair and the Christina to my Meredith for many years to come. We all need a person.

NaNoWriMo
I did it! That's about all I really have to say on this one. But, hey first year and I managed to complete the word count. My chin may of been tilted a little higher than usual that day. I'll be gracious and confess that I never in a million years would of managed to keep going if it weren't for my writing buddy (and everything else buddy). He was my rock throughout, and I thoroughly enjoyed the experience. Who needs adrenaline boosts from roller coasters when you have a deadline!?

Volunteering
This was one of my resolutions for 2015. Ironically, it wasn't time or health that held me back from volunteering in 2014, or 2013 for that matter.. It was confidence. Anxiety. A whole big thing that I won't bore you with as that isn't the point of this paragraph. Hello, we're on the good part. It was at the end of August that I waddled into a local charity sop and asked for a form. One step, and things just slotted into place. To be honest, it is bloody hard to juggle with the pain and I am often forced to cut down my hours due to it. But it's freedom, you can't put a price on that. It's something so small and so simple, but carries so much weight behind it for me. Plus you are doing something helpful, so bonus! I have also done a tiny bit with a local community thing and that has been equally incredible. As I am very unlikely to be able to hold down a job at this particular moment of time (pain and juggling it with being a carer for a family member), it's like my little escape from my bubble. Whether it be via handing out leaflets at a kids party, to sorting through bags of mostly junk..


Still in the volunteer category, I accomplished one of the things on my bucket list this year. Which was very obviously dressing as an elf and prancing around a grotto. Yup. Been there, done there. Mourning my elf costume.

Rediscovering Love, Differently.
Here we are again - love. I saved the best until last. Have you ever felt so incredibly lost and inhuman, that you fear the world around you will drop from under your feet at any moment? That you aren't worthy of the beauty of it all, so why should you belong here? Taking another human's spot? It all seems fictionalised for the worst reasons and you long for the silence. Maybe you know what I mean, maybe you are jut labelling me as crazy right now.. Either way, that's okay.  felt this way when this year began. I had already met this man, a friend; or that's what I tried to convince myself, this beautiful man. A heart of gold, words that could melt a coin, and a man who bore the gift of handing out laughter like it was as easy as a hug. He saved my sanity. He was the only one there and he didn't even realize it. To be honest, this post was written with the intention of documenting a year in my life. But now I'm writing, I see it, the reason for all these typed out words. A message to me, and anyone out there who is running scared from what they find unfamiliar. You see, this man, he appeared to offer me everything that I wanted, and most importantly, needed. He had it all in the palm of his hand and was offering it to me. Me! The girl who's heart still throbbed, and the girl who felt unworthy of one small compliment. How could I possibly accept it at this time in my life? I shouldn't of been happy, it was wrong on countless levels and I didn't accept his offerings for far longer than I ought to of. I guess you could say, I was scared. Scared that he would snatch his hand back after seeing my demons. He knew of them already, and yet I ran scared. Fear. Sodding fear. But you know what this silly man did? He said that it was okay, and waited. He didn't get mad, he didn't change anything.. Nothing changed between us. We continued to laugh. So.. The second time he asked, I pushed his hand aside and kissed him. Theoretically, of course. But that's how it felt. All those weeks wasted, thinking I deserved to continue to be unhappy for a wee while, for what? Even if you feel like you are the least worthy person on the planet to be offered something, big or small, if you desperately want it.. Do it. Don't make yourself unhappy. If you can change it, change it. And if you can't, I hope you find the strength to smile again.

So, yes. Love. Sweet love. My year started and ended with it, for two completely different reasons. And friendship vs. romantically. Someone somewhere can find the irony in that. I wouldn't change my current relationship for anything the world has to offer. For the first time in a good few years, I see a future. And yes, it does involve this certain gentleman but that isn't the point. He helped me want to live again. His love. Love. It's tragically beautiful.

This was a darn wordy blog post, my apologies. If you made it to the end, then.. I love you. Too much? Okay. I'll give you free chocolate. Or coffee. I'd go with the coffee. I hope your 2015 went well, or that you will at least step into 2016 with a smile on your face and hope in your heart.

My resolution post should be up soon.
Happy New Year, ya filthy animal. (Oops, wrong. I can't let go of Christmas!)

I was looking for a Christmassy post to write out, and remembered BroganTatexo doing a tag video that was originally made by someone else. Chain reaction. So I watched, wrote down the questions, and we're off. I need to stop doing a chit-chat at the beginning of the a blog post. I also need a greeting. "Howdy!" doesn't really seem to cut it nowadays. Plus I'm Welsh, not Southern. Wish I was though. Anyhoo, I digress, read on. Please. Maybe. It's right there, go on..


What's your favourite Holiday movie?
I want to say Elf. But my heart says The Santa Clause. Or Black Xmas.

What are your favourite Christmas colours?
Red and green, you can't beat the elfness of it. I'm still on the hunt for a perfect red skater dress that I can pair with a green cardigan and embrace the festiveness.

Do you like to stay in your PJ's or dress up for Christmas?
I usually dress up, just for the novelty of it. I'm not really a PJ's girl (I know, I know.. Blogger sin. Burn me at the stake,).

If you could only buy one person a present this year, who would it be?
As you can probably guess, this is an impossible question to ask. So, I'm going to go with my cat. Just to be fair to my loved ones. Not at all because it's my honest answer, nope. That'd be crazy. Or would it be? Yeah. It would. Would it?

Do you open your presents Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?
Both! My and my mother swap one present at Christmas Eve night (Usually cheesy Christmas PJ's for her, and an oversized t-shirt that has something Christmas themed on for me.), and we open the rest on Christmas morning.

Have you ever built a gingerbread house?
Nope! I really want to though,  Just need someone to eat it for me. Any volunteers?

What do you like to do on your Christmas break?
Six words: Three day Christmas movie marathon. Food.

Any Christmas wishes?
I'm going to assume this question is asked directly to me. As in, I can't wish for peace on Earth or for millions of happy faces come Christmas morning. So to be perfectly honest, no. Not really. I, of course, hope that the day will be as beautiful as it is magical to young children. I'd just wish for a happy Christmas. One I look back to come future years and smile at the memories. If Santa also wants to steal a certain American in a sleigh and drop him at my doorstep, that'd be nifty.

Favourite Christmas smell?
Tinsel. Hands down.

Favourite Christmas meal or treat?
Terry's Chocolate Orange, but the mini exploding candy ones. Or the tube of pink Smarties. They scream Christmas to me.

So, there you have it. I apologize for the randomness of this post but I was in the mood to post something and failed miserably at coming up with an original idea. I hope you enjoyed the quick read.

I wish you all a Merry Christmas, or just a lovely week if you don't celebrate it. Hug a loved one.

Okay, so maybe lyric rewrites aren't my speciality. And if you don't know who Gingy is, I question your movie taste. (Shrek, just FYI.) This is normally my boyfriend's corner of the Internet, as I am no reviewer and pretty much suck at getting my thoughts across eloquently. I'm a mess in the brain department, but also a horror buff. And a little crazed when it comes to Christmas. I am actually writing this while wearing a Christmas cat apron, and accompanied by the jingle of the bells on my antlers. Because, well, why not?

When I first saw the trailer for Krampus way back in October, I knew I needed to see this movie. There was no question about it. There appears to be a major lack in the Christmas-Horror world. Sure, you have the obvious choices like Black Christmas, Silent Night Deadly Night, P2, Silent Night (They like using that pun, huh?), but there aren't enough to keep me entertained throughout the entire month of December. The travesty! It's a joy to have a new movie to add to my list.

Now, let's get one thing out of the way. If you're going into this movie with either high expectations, or expecting to experience some sort of Rob Zombie movie, don't be idiotic. There's a killer gingerbread man in one of the trailers. Come on now! I had the displeasure of viewing Krampus with a guy who apparently expected it to be some spine chilling horror, and bitched about the silliness of it for hours later. I'll repeat for good measure, it has a killer gingerbread man in the trailer. 'Kay?


Krampus is pretty self explanatory. It's about Krampus, the horned opposite of Santa from Alpine Folklore. He supposedly punishes children who have misbehaved, unlike Santa who rewards them. That is a real simple way of putting it, if you want to read more Google is your best friend. But you are here for the movie review. So.. Upon the opening scenes of Krampus, I laughed, went awww, and was slapped in the face by festiveness. To be completely honest, I was a little worried as I started to debate whether we were in for a Gremlins experiences (nothing wrong with that!), and not much horror going on. But I was proved wrong not long after. Was the start of the story a little dragged out? Maybe. But I appreciated the opportunity to get to know all the characters. The dysfunctional "classic" american family, who bicker constantly and have one child who wishes for a perfect Christmas.

Said child was played by Emjay Anthony, his character Max Engel was arguably the main character of this movie and he did a pretty good job at playing the role. Parks and Recreation's Adam Scott played the loveable father, and Toni Collette (The Sixth Sense, Fright Night, Little Miss Sunshine) played the meh mother. They were decently written characters but there wasn't much to note. David Koechner (The Office, Anchorman, Final Destination 3) played Howard, the character you loved to hate. He was possibly my favourite solely for the fact that he made me laugh in every scene he was in. It also starred Conchata Ferrell (Two and a Half Men), Krista Stadler, Stefania LaVie Owen (The Carrie Diaries), and Allison Tolman (Fargo). The acting was good, but cheesy at times which I think was the goal. It was a cheesy gore feast.

The story itself, as I previously mentioned, revolved around Max. A young boy who wants nothing more than a perfect Christmas with his family. He wishes for this in a letter to Santa, but after getting teased and causing a "little" family tiff, rips up said letter and chucks it out of his window and into the night sky. The scene is beautifully shot as the pieces of paper magically get pulled into a mini tornado of sorts and we watch as the power of the town goes out. You have to give the movie at least that. With the blizzard outside, the arguing family's only question is how they are going to survive the upcoming few days (not the mention Christmas itself!) without any gas or electricity. If only they knew..

From that moment on, the movie really gets going. The first death scene has great suspense, and although you know exactly what is going to happen, you still find yourself wanting to yell at the character to move it. Other "frightful" scenes are a mixture of horrory and just plain silly, but that's the joy in it. The elves we meet later on in the movie are bloody terrifying, and a take on them that I haven't seen in any other Christmas/Horror adaptation.

Time to be a Grinch and mention the things that I didn't enjoy about the movie. The first death that I mentioned above involved one of the many children in this movie, and I felt as though the parents managed to forget about said child with a blink of an eye. They wanted a search party, and then boom... Let's all barricade ourselves in for the night, forget him/her. That annoyed me. Secondly, we get a little expected tale midway through the movie to explain who Krampus is. But it's animated. Say, what? Yes, it was beautifully done and fun, I suppose. But it did take away from the horrory aspect a little. Unless I am missing something completely obvious, it was just weird. And lastly (ironic), the ending. It was.. Well.. Three people said "what?" as the end credits rolled. I saw it coming due to a fairly obvious spoiler you will realize once you watch it, but it still doesn't make absolute sense to me. But you know what? I enjoyed the fun of getting to the ending so much, that I kinda don't care. Which is a terrible thing to say, I know. But.. Did I mention I really like horrors and Christmas?

This was undoubtedly a movie that had a better atmosphere in theatres. I jumped a grand total of twice during the film and that is pretty darn impressive for me as I am dead on the inside and hardly ever get a fright when it comes to horrors. Saying this, I doubt I would of had I seen this for the first time on DVD. The surround sound most definitely played a part in the scare factor. The other thing I'd like to mention is that if you have a phobia of clowns you may want to skip Kampus. My mother is, and she wound up in the fetal position and felt the need to ask me to go to the toilets with her. So, yup. May want to consider that.


All in all, I enjoyed Krampus  and it was exactly what I went in expecting. It had the Christmas movie feel without being a proper one, and didn't take itself too seriously which made it all the more enjoyable. I'd recommend you go to the theatres to watch it if you're interested in a good bit of horror style cheese, but otherwise maybe wait for it to go down to £7 in the sales next Christmas. And as I said in the beginning, if you take movies seriously, give it a miss. You may wind up a tad wound up.. Or even, tinselled up. Get it? I'll stop typing now.

Merry Christmas!

Right now, you are only 7 ingredients and an easy 7 steps from having deliciousness in your mouth. This quick and lazy pumpkin pie is basically cinnamony goodness, with a texture that almost resembles cheesecake. Creamy, and practically melts in the mouth. Fancy giving it a go? Well, read on..

Saying that, if you're a chef or more of an Ina Garten over Nigella, I'd advise you to look away now. This is your basic "cheat" pumpkin pie recipe, but adapted to suit my laziness.. I mean.. preference. You'll probably end up crying over my mistakes or broken rules, which I am more than willing to put up with if it means you'll make me pie yourself. But if you're just going to complain.. Don't be a Halloween Grinch. To the rest of you folks, enjoy!

(Side-note: I'll apologize now for the shoddy/unappetizing photos. I had the bright idea to bake at 3am and that doesn't bode well with lighting. Forgive me!)








I'll be honest, I was hesitant to try this out as I'd never made a pie/tart before, nor had I tried pumpkin. I'm more of a cookie/brownie/muffin girl. It was a failure waiting to happen. Alas, it worked out and has given me the urge to step out of my comfort zone when it comes to baking. My moods have been atrocious over the past few weeks, and I find baking to be very relaxing. It shuts my mind off, even for just an hour. The result? Happy family and co-workers with full stomachs. Nothing wrong with that.

I am tempted to attempt to make a pumpkin pie from scratch over the holidays, so perhaps there will be an updated (and likely far more complicated) version of this blog post. Who knows?

Thank you for reading.
 Happy baking (and yes, this counts!). Hope you all had a wonderful Halloween.

October is the month for crisp leaves fluttering to the ground, Americans making us Brits jealous with their many, many, many pumpkin spice flavoured choices, fancy dress, and great movies. (Also, if you live in my house, a stone's worth of sugar filled goodness). Today, I'm going to suggest some movie options for over this spooktacular month. Some classic, some new, some underrated.

Ready, set, treat! Or maybe trick. You'll have to watch to find out. (Or read. I didn't think that sentence through.)

Let's start with a classic, and my favourite..


If you haven't seen this movie, I question whether you are actually living on the planet earth. Maybe you're an alien who hacked his/her way onto the Earth's technology system and sadly ended up on this blog instead of Google. So, err, hi there. Seriously though, this movie is a must over Halloween.

 Psychopath (or wildly misunderstand man) Michael Myers returns home 15 years after brutally murdering his family to continue his killing spree. This and 'Halloween H20: 20 Years Later, 1998' are mine and my mother's personal favourites. It wouldn't be Halloween without them.

It of course stars the wonderful Jamie Lee Curtis and Donald Pleasence. You must know this.

The remake is also worth a watch (Just the first, let's all act like 'Halloween II, 2009' didn't happen.) but for Halloween, I say stick to the original. Or maybe marathon them. Yeah, marathon them.

We all knew this one would make it in. Whether you are 4 or 40, you will find yourself singing along to Bette Midler's version of 'Put a Spell On You' as you get lost in the magic of this Disney flick. A cat that talks, vacuums that fly, and insane hairdo's that will leave you wondering how many cans of hairspray were used during the making of this movie.

Bette Midler is incredible, Sarah Jessica Alba and Kathy Najimy's craziness only adds silly string to the fun. If you haven't watched it, do it. I can guarantee you won't regret it. You'll laugh, get enthralled in the magic, and possibly weep at that one particular scene.

I can't wait to rewatch this movie for the first time, through the eyes of my future child. It's one of those magical movies.

This one is for the readers who want a little scare this Halloween. Horrors are my favourite genre of movie, and I could easily fill this list with options for you to enjoy. But I had to narrow it down, and The Strangers definitely made the cut.

Starring Liv Tyler and  Scott Speedman, The Strangers taps into that fear we all have buried deep inside of us, you know the one, the one that niggles at the back of your skull when you have to put the bin out in the middle of the night, eerie silence and darkness looming over you. The one you get when you think you catch a second reflection in the windows when it's pitch dark out. When someone bangs on the front door too loud, making you jump out of your skin, and question for barely a second whether you actually want to open it. Yeah, those fun fears.

I'm not going to describe the plot to this movie to a T, as I think it'll ruin the fun. Just watch it. It's more of a thriller that turns to a horror, but is exceptionally enjoyable.


The Collector follows Arkin, a man who is forced into pulling off a thieving job to pay off some debts. Targeting a wealthy family's mansion, he sets his sights on a valuable jewel that is locked away in the safe. The family is supposedly on vacation. Break in, take a jewel, easy as chips. Right? Wrong. (Shocker. A horror not going smoothly, oh the surprise.) He soon finds himself in a game of cat and mouse with a masked madman who has kidnapped the family and turned the house into one big fun house with deathly traps.

What makes this movie enjoyable is the character Arkin. I've never wanted the main character in a horror/slasher to survive so badly. He is smart, cunning, and doesn't make a single flaw in judgement throughout the movie. That is what makes him great. You never want to yell at the TV over his idiocy, and the result is you holding your breath as he narrowly slides by this masked man. I wish more movies in this genre had such well written characters.

Keep an open mind, and enjoy the ridiculous ride that these movies are. Also, join me in the Arkin fan club at ArkinLovers.net. Jokes. Kind of.

Want some humour mixed into all that blood and guts? Look no further. Now, this may seem like an obvious choice. But every single time I mention it to someone, they say "I haven't seen that in years!. Which is a damn crime, if you ask me. Which you didn't. But hey ho.

They did countless Scary Movies. The last I saw being the fourth..? Maybe fifth. But nothing beats the originality of the original. Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Sixth Sense, The Blair Witch Project.. All the best movies! (All of which I recommend for Halloween. This does not count as cheating.).

Whether you've seen this once or ten times, you'll laugh and enjoy it. It is never a bad option. (Unless, like us, you only own it on VHS and get really baffled over why the remote doesn't work each time you want to press pause. Ah, the idiocy. No shame.)
Firstly, let's talk about the actors in this: The gorgeous Emma Stone, the hilarious Woody Harrelson, and the loveable Jesse Eisenberg. Talk about a dream cast. Even Abigail Breslin is note worthy. Secondly, who doesn't love a good zombie movie? Add in a list of rules that involve 'Beware of Bathrooms' and 'Don't Be a Hero', and you have one that will top your favourites list.

The plot is as the title would suggest - a zombie apocalypse. It's a zombieland. Some unknown virus is wiping out all the humans, and unlike those downers in The Walking Dead, these guys actually have a plan. Go to a funfair, find some twinkies, and well, er.. survive?

Everyone should watch this movie at least once. What better time is there than Halloween? The party day for Zomb's. No nicknames? Fair enough.

This may not strike you as a Halloween movie, but there's a Halloween party in it.. So.. When isn't it okay to watch Mean Girls? The costumes always make me excited for Halloween, and that scene with the flying popcorn is probably my favourite one in the movie.

Does really need more of a plot? It's Mean Girls.


This is a hidden gem that many seem to look over. It's a slasher with a twist. Filmed in the style of a mockumentary, Behind The Mask follows the aspiring serial killer Leslie Vernon, as he gets ready for his debut into the slasher world. Wanting to follow in the steps of the likes of Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, and Kruger, he invites a documentary crew to come along and film his story.

Starring Nathan Baesel, Angela Goethals, Scoot Wilson, and the wonderful Robert Englund, the cast doesn't fall short. I urge any slasher lover to give this movie a go. It's both hilarious and mind-racing. It is unlike anything I have watched before, and although the ending is rather predictable, the ride to it is riveting.

Alright folks, that's all I can think of for tonight.

Got any other Halloween movie suggestions? Please, please, please tweet them to me at @RootingBranches. Or comment. You can never own too many movies.

I hope your October is coming along nicely.

Thanks for reading.